Emotional

That's the only word I can use to describe Paul's funeral. Or these whole past few days, for that matter.

There were so many people there. I'm usually more likely to cry at a wedding than a funeral, but I'll admit that today I just couldn't help myself.

His daughters had asked one of their cousins to get up and speak because they knew they wouldn't be able to keep their composure. The cousin almost kept it together. She did get through it though.

At the cemetery we were all given flowers to place on the casket. Most were roses. I don't know what mine was but tiny bees kept hovering around me and landing on it. I liked that, but I don't know why.

I'm pretty sure the reality of this whole thing hasn't struck me yet.